The Middle of Nowhere

I love being in the middle of nowhere.  Lately it's just been a good place for Joshua and me.

 

We love watching sunsets!

 

Beautiful oaks near LaBelle and more nowhere places in North Carolina.

  There is a place in us that only God can see and hear.  In the quietness of the moment, that realization crosses our mind and suddenly we are aware that we are not alone.  Nowhere becomes a real place where God comes and dwells with us and once again we enjoy the beauty of simply being with Him ... in the middle nowhere. 

We are still nowhere and loving it - more nowhere pictures to come.

JOSHUA AND FAMILY IN GOLDSBORO

After spending a month in and out of hotels and with family;  Allan, Joshua and I are in a town home in Goldsboro which we rent from a Mr. Thomas.  We call this place the "Thomas Trap" partly because we feel stuck in this rather dingy, dark place which appeared a lot cleaner when we first saw it, but the electricity was not turned on so that was our first mistake.  I spent two days cleaning someone elses dirt.  I am too clean.

 There is no yard and we have our 70 pound dog along with kitty.  So dog duty and searching for a good litter box spot are a continuing factor. Did I mention that we are right by the air force base which I don't mind, but our dog is terrified of the sounds from their  "practice" shooting.  If there is any noise when I try to walk her, she bolts back for the house.

My bright spot is the pool right by the town home and we usually have it all to ourselves.  I thank God every time I swim - only He know how therapeutic swimming is for Joshua and me.!!!

Since we don't plan to be here very long we are picking up cheap things to use around the house.  So Joshua and I have been hitting the thrift shops.  Joshua is a very "hands on" kid so shopping with him is challenging.  But, we have done well from our $19 table complete with gum under it to our $5 sunflower picture.

I remember all the fun things we have done this month from hiking in NC mountains to surfing in Melbourne Bch.  We have spent a lot of time at the beach with family and friends swimming, surfing and hanging out!  We played in streams in the mountains and saw deer and saw baby turtles make their way to the ocean.

Joshua is a trooper, though I know he is wondering when we will be going back home, and for the first time, I miss our old house.  I sometimes question if we did the right thing by selling our house.  I think it's not the actual house, but the memories and familiarity of a place we lived for 12 years that I miss. 

When I was walking through the stores in the historic area of St Augustine, I saw a little plague that read, "Home is where your mom is."  Moms work hard to make a house a home by pouring out a lot of love and sacrifice and I hope I am doing that wherever our family finds ourselves be it temporary or permanent.

I guess God has us here right now for a reason.  Joshua and I continue to work on learning more sign language on the computer.  We are still looking at real estate on line for a house near Fort Myers.  We are slowing down our pace and continue to try to live one day at a time and be thankful, although I just heard they are closing the pool after Labor Day. :(

Sometimes it's easy to get discouraged and tired in our walk of faith.  My new prayer is Psalm 119:32 " I will not merely walk, but run the way of Your commandments, when You give me a heart that is willing. "   How great to know that He's helping my hard heart to become a willing heart.  Willing to follow Him and walk in His ways.  Keep us in your prayers as we go through all of these changes and continue to take one day at a time; especially after Labor Day!

Where is Home?

Our family just moved from our home of 12 years.  This was a dramatic change for Joshua and the rest of the family.  When you move, everything is foreign and you long for familiarity and stability.  We have been in a hotel room for the past week looking for a place to live temporarily in North Carolina.  Next week we will be searching for a house in Florida to call our permanent residence.

This experience has caused us all to examine our own lives and determine the direction in which we believe that God is leading.  It has also opened my eyes to see the beautiful presence of God in every situation.  Even though I am in a new place I am also on familiar ground, spiritually speaking, because I read in Romans 8: 38-39 that nothing can separate me from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus.  Nothing! Not even being in an unfamiliar place with people I don't know.


I am amazed and humbled by the people God has brought into my life that have ministered to me in His name.  My friend, Betty cleaned my house one day while a number of other friends picked up every stick of furniture I own and put it into a truck for storage.  My friend, Liza was with me everyday, determined to help me get 12 years of living out of the house.  She is still keeping my dog for me also.  People brought me meals, played with Joshua, encouraged and supported me emotionally.  (There were tears.)  Too many friends to name volunteered, all receiving nothing, but giving anyway.  (Well, there was pizza and doughnuts :))))

I"m hoping this new move will allow me to spend more time helping Joshua.  Our goal is to become much more fluent in sign language and in our use of technology for communication for those who are nonverbal like Joshua.

Moving or change, though difficult doesn't have to be a bad thing.  This morning I read a verse  in Isaiah that is perfect for my  family and I am going to write it on a card and put it on my refrigerator wherever that may be in the near future.

Isaiah 43:19  Behold, I am doing a new thing; now it springs forth; do you not perceive and know it, and will you not give heed to it?  I will even make a way in the wilderness and rivers in the desert.

My prayers is that wherever we are we will always remember that God is with us each moment and when we walk with Him ... we are at home.

PROGRESS?

Some days just seem to run together even though they are full of same and different things.  Slices of life are served up too quickly with an original generic fleeting taste.  Halt the process dear Father in heaven until the juice of truth saturates this frail heart ever holding on.

 

Please pray for Joshua to grow and learn and be all God wants him to be and to be filled with His Spirit.  His mom can always use prayer too!  :)

Blogless in Brevard

For those of you who follow my blog, (a few people I hope, maybe my sister :)) I apologize for not writing anything for the past month.  I'll blame it on computer complications and etc...  Really the time has flown and by the time I get Joshua in bed my brain slips into neutral and that's it for the night.

Joshua started a new school and it has been good for him and for me.  This is a Christian private school that wants to especially help students who may not fit perfectly into a public school.  And, they are so happy he is there and tell me wonderful, positive things about him everyday.!!

You would think I would have so much more time on my hands with him in school for a few hours a day, but there seems to always be a myriad of things to do.  With Allan so busy with his job, a lot of things fall into my lap.  However, I don't want to complain because God takes such good care of us every single day and we are blessed abundantly beyond what we could ask or think!!

watching "Tangled"

This past weekend we had some family come spend the night and I would like to tell you about two little girls that love Joshua and that he loves also.  Trinia and Joyah are my niece, Kristen's daughters.  I think their ages are almost 2 and 5.  They both have beautiful golden hair and contagious smiles.

three on a skateboard

What I love most about Trinia and Joyah is that they teach others how to love unconditionally.  To them Joshua is not a person with special needs, but someone who is fun to be with and they have a great time together.  Joyah told her mom that Joshua "rocks" (literally) "and I like that".

family fun!

I wish  we could all love and accept others like little children do.  Jesus tells us in the Bible to be like that and to come to Him as a child. It was a little like heaven this weekend, and ... I'm still savoring the memories.

Not Just Another Sunday Morning

Sunday morning everything was against me.  I was trying to get our house ready to show potential buyers, getting ready for church and for going to St Augustine after the service, all before 8:30 A.M.  By the time we arrived at church I was stressed.  I watched all the beautiful, perfect people enter the building with their perfect kids and felt totally inadequate.

It's very hard going somewhere new with Joshua.  We had visited this church one time before, but I was not ready to face the stares from strangers who always seem to have this expressions like they are not sure what disability Joshua has, but if they stare long enough, maybe it will come to them.

Somehow, we manged our way through the crowd and upstairs to a remote loft with tables and chairs and a large TV screen on which we could watch the service without worry of causing too much distraction.  (I know, I am very self-conscious.  I'm workin on it.)

It was a great message on finance.  This is Allan's cup of tea, so to speak - he loves and is well educated in the is area.  Joshua enjoyed a coffee smoothie and drew on a paper.

When it was time to go, we decided to slip out early as we had to hit the road to St. Augustine.  As I walked past a teenage girl, she motioned to me to come over.   Pointing to Joshua she said, "I just want to tell you that I see so much light coming from him".

I wasn't even aware anyone was watching him.  I thanked her and told her that was really encouraging to me.  Wow!  She must be an amazing girl, herself.  It was worth coming just to hear those words.  Thank you God, Light of the World,  for that gift!!  And help me not be afraid to shine some of Your light too!

WHO WILL STAND?

Joshua hugging bear!

Joshua started a new school this year.  It is a small private school and we are praying he will learn much and make new friends.  Allan is back to work, Jeremy is back to college and Lauren is at work.  This is my first time in weeks to sit down with my new laptop and post a blog.

Unfortunately, I am being pulled in many directions at this time in my life so THE JOSHUA JOURNEY may be limited for awhile.  I would love to have the leisure to write and tell you more about Joshua and all the ways he amazes me everyday.  He is such a loving and insightful boy who is quickly growing into a young man.

One thing that amazes me the most is Joshua's love and acceptance for other people.  He has a passion for life and people no matter who they are, where they are from or what they look like.  I echo the words of Brandon Heath for God to,  "give me Your eyes so I can see everything that I keep missing, give me Your love for humanity".

As I start this new year I want to be like Joshua and have that passion for others and for this world.  It's so easy to walk past someone on the street you know is hurting, to drive by a homeless person holding a sign or overlook a family member who is struggling. 

Another Christian artist, Matthew West, sings, "I don't want to go one more day without Your all consuming passion inside of me.  So, I decided to make that my prayer for this new year, to ask God for that kind of passion, which will require time and energy from me to spend everyday in God's word and prayer.  Also, time and energy to do what He tells me to do, and like Joshua, to stand for Him.  Will you join us?